So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
