Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.

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(386): View more from Florida

I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife

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(510): View more from California

i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me

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(906): View more from Michigan

The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(410): View more from Maryland

I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking

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(435): View more from Utah

he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!

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(903): View more from Texas

The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night

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(716): View more from New York

But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.

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