therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
