Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
The police scanner is talking about you again....
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car