So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
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Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
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He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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