i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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