Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I think we might need a safe word for this...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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