im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
