This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
