I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
