marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
