yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
