i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
