i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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