and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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