I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
