doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize