Define "chronic" masturbator.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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