Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Randomize
