i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
