Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
