Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
