it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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