Texts From Last Night

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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  If that was your dad, he is hot

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  (843): If that was your dad, he is hot http://tfl.nu/drkt
  Replies (8) Good night (987) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Hey its my first time.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think you mean "it's my first time"

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  (859): Hey its my first time. (513): I think you mean "it's my first time" http://tfl.nu/xwgu
  Replies (55) Good night (577) Bad night (1704)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  did it hurt when the cum got in your eye

  (469): View more from Texas

  not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash

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  (214): did it hurt when the cum got in your eye (469): not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash http://tfl.nu/j0vs
  Replies (44) Good night (751) Bad night (2869)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.

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  (815): I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair. http://tfl.nu/f22e
  Replies (12) Good night (595) Bad night (3825) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad

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  (317): The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad http://tfl.nu/cny5
  Replies (20) Good night (3486) Bad night (980) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.

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  (240): One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order. http://tfl.nu/2w08
  Replies (6) Good night (2057) Bad night (909) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.

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  (908): He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca. http://tfl.nu/7ojr
  Replies (6) Good night (3330) Bad night (1012) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.

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  (617): I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar. http://tfl.nu/rzqi
  Replies (4) Good night (2094) Bad night (647) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar

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  (412): Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar http://tfl.nu/l67v
  Replies (8) Good night (2319) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.

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  (+44): When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone. http://tfl.nu/uct6
  Replies (4) Good night (430) Bad night (1074)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.

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  (801): After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me. http://tfl.nu/tfvw
  Replies (4) Good night (596) Bad night (1358) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten

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  (904): Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten http://tfl.nu/vxzl
  Replies (2) Good night (918) Bad night (216) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries

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  (423): So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries http://tfl.nu/0e3x
  Replies (3) Good night (816) Bad night (215) Order T-Shirt
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!

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  (520): Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again! http://tfl.nu/ddjb
  Replies (4) Good night (697) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.

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  (304): Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about. http://tfl.nu/t5bz
  Replies (3) Good night (695) Bad night (141) Order T-Shirt

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