Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
