i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
