you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
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