I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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