you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
