You really coming over, don't trick.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
My vagina is very pro this idea
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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