so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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