I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
