ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
