I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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