So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
