Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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