I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
