So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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