What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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