Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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