He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
