Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
