I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Text me some of your sweat
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