Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
NoShamevember. You game?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Randomize
