But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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