Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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