pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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