Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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