After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
