Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
