I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
