You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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