I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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